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The Definition of Success

Tuesday November 17 2009 by ocean1025

This is something of an “interactive post,” folks. If you can bear with my rambling thoughts in the beginning about my birthday and my horoscope and all, eventually I will get to the point of what this post is all about – discovering your own idea of what success means. I do hope you will take a few moments to share your own thoughts on the definition of success in the commentary section!

~ Ocean

Back in October, I celebrated my 51st birthday. It was a rather quiet affair, since I really didn’t have the money or the opportunity to do anything special. Ate a free dinner at a local barbecue restaurant (wasn’t too bad), got a free drink at a local pub I frequent, read my birthday wishes from friends on Facebook (thank you!) Nothing really exciting.

I also took a moment to check my daily horoscope and see what it had to say for my birthday. I confess that while I do believe in astrology, I take these horoscope things with a grain of salt… but I still do find them interesting to read, and there have been times when they’ve been amazingly accurate.

So this is what it had to say for October 25th, my birthday:

Born today, you know what you want, but you don’t always know how to get it — and this can be a source of intense frustration for you throughout your lifetime. It may seem, at times, as though you’ve been left out in the cold, separated from those who are enjoying the success they so desire. Or you may sense that while others were learning valuable life lessons, you were learning things that were completely impractical and could never propel you forward toward your goals. Much of this is mere illusion, however; avoid making such excuses for yourself.

The truth is that you have tremendous talent and tremendous potential — but sometimes lack the drive required to fulfill that potential and reap the greatest benefits from that talent. Only you can remedy this situation, of course; do so, and the world is yours.

I must confess…when I read this birthday horoscope, I ended up crying a little. It describes so accurately how I often feel these days. That sense of frustration that I deserve more than this, that I should be doing more than this, but somehow I’m being left out in the cold. I see others who are happy and successful and doing well, and then I look at myself:

“I’m 51 years old, and what do I have to show for it?”

It just feels like in the last ten years or so my life has taken a downward slide. I haven’t been as successful professionally as I would like – traveling from job to job, and I haven’t even lasted more than a couple of months at some of them. I haven’t found my soul mate, and I’m not doing what I really want to be doing with my life.

As for that feeling of “learning things that are completely impractical” – I often joke around about how it seems I have this knack for learning asinine facts that serve no practical purpose but to win Trivia Pursuit games. As for learning anything that could actually propel me forward towards my goals…

I decided to share my thoughts with some of my close friends, and naturally they all had words of comfort and support. Many of them could identify with how I was feeling and what I am going through.

But it was my friend Quinn who really had an interesting, thought-provoking response for me. She started with wishing me a Happy Birthday, and then reminded me of the wisdom and knowledge I have gathered over the years. The problem is, as she clearly stated… I seem to be struggling with how to use it.

Quinn then went on to ask me a simple, and yet not-so-simple question:

Let’s start with something simple.

Everyone has an idea of what success is.

What is your idea of success? Is it money, friends, a comfortable home? Is it a job you love? I can’t define it for you. But until you know, no one else will.

So let’s start there.

Tell me what success is, and then we can go on to the next step.


Wow.

The more I thought about it, the more I realized that I was struggling with this question. Just what is my definition of success? Do I really not know… or do I just not want to deal with coming up with an answer I can be comfortable with?

I suppose I could take the easy way out and say “all of the above!” Sure, I would like to have enough money so I can go to sleep at night without worrying about the bills. Certainly it’s nice to have friends. I wouldn’t mind having a nice comfortable home, or that dream job that I absolutely adore.

But are these truly my definitions of success?

I admit that I am still pondering this one, folks. It seems that for every idea of what success means to me, I come up with yet another one that seems even better. I guess my definition of success depends on what time of the day you’re asking. Sometimes it’s just as simple as being able to find my damn car keys. Other times it’s as complicated as finding inner peace, and contentment with who and what I am.

But as Quinn says…

“Until you know, no one else will.”

So I’d now like to ask YOU, gentle reader.

What is YOUR idea of success?

How do you define success?

Please share your thoughts below…

I’d really love to know what you think!


Note: Quinn is a Certified Creativity Coach

learn more about her at her website

http://quinncreative.com/

or her blog

http://quinncreative.wordpress.com/

I encourage you to go check her out

She’s a really cool person, and a great friend. Thanks, Quinn!


Posted in Archives #3 A Deaf Pagan Shares, Astrology, Deaf/Hearing Relations, Empowerment, Healing, Spirituality, Universal Issues, Women, Women's Spirituality | 9 Comments »

November’s Full Moon – Migration of the Ancient Bird Goddess

Sunday November 1 2009 by ocean1025

November, 2009

The Taurian Moon Lights the Migration

of the

Ancient Bird Goddess

The November full moon on Monday, November 2nd is in the earthy, fixed sign of Taurus. Taurus, the second sign of the zodiac, is represented by a bull and ruled by Venus in her earthy, fecund aspect. Stories of the Goddess of the Land, the Empress in Tarot, and the concept of sovereignty (kings rule by ‘marriage’ with the Goddess of the land: as in the King Arthur legends and the stories of Inanna) all encompass what the almost preverbal Taurus represents within the 12 archetypes represented by the 12 signs.*

Under this full moon Taurus calls us to desire to acknowledge our feelings; to be open to all of our senses. Taurus values the slow progression…and realizes that time brings understanding and wisdom. Taurus likes to take information in through the senses for such deeper understanding and knowing. Taurus is our guide to information that we gain outside the visual and verbal.

The image that I see in this month’s chart is very interesting. Starting with our basic Sun/Moon opposition we find the Sun in the 10th house – what we are known for – conjunct (joined by) Ceres the Goddess Asteroid of nurturance; and Mercury, planet of how we think and communicate. The Moon is in the home of our female ancestors and family in the 4th house.

Nov chart

The Moon becomes the point of a ‘V’ by a trine to the transforming planet of shadows and underground wealth – Pluto, in the 11th house of social groups and institutions.

Here I see the ancient mothers and the point rather than an arrow is the migration of birds. Geese, ducks, cranes are all in migration from northern breeding grounds to southern climes. In the case of cranes they will go from the family unit of 3-4 birds (mother, father and usually 1, occasionally 2 new chicks) to join in large flocks on the wintering grounds. The cranes traveling through Nebraska and Kansas are most likely headed for the Gulf coast wetlands in Texas.

The image of the bird mother is a popular and common theme through ancient goddess imagery, shamanistic imagery, eastern European embroidery designs, and myths… all the way to today as in the Mother Goose tales that we have known since childhood. With Pluto in the 11th I wonder what transformations our social institutions and groups need to undergo to follow the lead of the ancient and nature wise Taurian Moon mothers in their bird form.

Do we follow their example and join with others of our kind to make an exodus to warmer, more welcoming climes till the next fertile season that beckons us northward? Animal migrations still perplex scientist while mystifying and beautifying human existence. How do they know where they are going? How to get there? When to leave?

geese migration

There is another line of aspect. Jupiter, planet of expansion, spirituality and storytelling, in the 1st house squares and challenges both Sun and Moon. Mars, planet of the desire to relate in the 7th house of intimate partners and open enemies also squares the Moon and Sun opposition. However Mars and Jupiter do not oppose one another, being just barely out of aspect. Visually this creates a broken line of landscape, reminding me of a mountain and the mountain ranges that many birds fly over, twice, in migration. Or does it represent ocean waves that other birds traverse for great distances in their purposeful wanderings? Either way, the image reflects back upon itself and within the parameters of Taurian gifts and wisdom.

So do we become like birds, using our natural abilities and memories to find our path of migration from breeding to wintering grounds… always trying to avoid the pitfalls of weather and predator, relying on some source of information that we trust to steer our course? For this time of the Taurean Moon I say yes.

eagle_woman“Eagle Woman” by Susan Seddon Boulet

Let your intuition wander and wonder; let your feelings be guided by Nature. Words may not come easily, but do you really need them? Feed your senses and they will nourish you. Turn to our ancient Mothers for guidance when needed. Allow your feelings to express themselves… to feed or compost as needed. Our Taurian Moon Mothers know that just like the migrating animals, our souls seek and need different environments at different times.

Respectfully submitted,
Beverly Hof-Miller

*The Zodiac starts with Aries, a fire cardinal sign. The 12 signs can be applied to a number of different metaphor/archetypal systems. One such system reflects the active/rest cycle or the cycle of expansion/ contraction or outward/inward focus. Aries begins with active/expansive/outward energy while Taurus moves toward rest/contraction/inward. Then Gemini expands while Cancer moves inward.

Another system relates to the stages of life from birth to death. Aries would be the burst of energy needed to move outward-birth-while in Taurus the infant explores its environment through its senses and Gemini would represent the beginnings of language and thought development by interacting outside one’s self continuing though to Pisces as that time in old age when one turns to the inner world of spirit.

Posted in Archives #4 Pagan Thoughts and Writings, Astrology, Beasts and Animals, Divination, Nature, Paganism, Women's Spirituality, witchcraft | Leave a Comment »

The Spiral Dance Providing ASL Interpreters

Monday October 12 2009 by ocean1025

Back in the early eighties, when I was just beginning my journey down the Pagan Path, I bought my first book on Paganism.

A book that changed my life profoundly back then, and continues to do so to this very day.

That book was The Spiral Dance, written by the well-known Pagan leader and author, Starhawk.

spiraldance

For myself as well as thousands of others, this book has played a leading role in introducing us to the concept of Goddess worship. As explained on Starhawk’s own website,

This bestselling classic is both an unparalleled reference on the practices and philosophies of Witchcraft and a guide to the life-affirming ways in which readers can turn to the Goddess to deepen their sense of personal pride, develop their inner power, and integrate mind, body, and spirit.

The Spiral Dance was published in 1979, and around Samhain of that year the Reclaiming Collective, of which Starhawk is a founding member, held the first Spiral Dance ritual.

Thirty years later, the Spiral Dance continues. This year, the 30th Anniversary of this ritual will take place on the night of Samhain itself – October 31st.

What is the Spiral Dance? It is a ritual to honor our beloved dead and to dance the spiral of rebirth:

We gather to remember and honor our ancestors, our Beloved Dead, and all those who have crossed over. As we mourn for those we love who have died this year, we also mourn the losses and pain suffered by the Earth, our Mother. Yet even as we grieve we also remember and honor the sacred cycle of life, death, rebirth and regeneration, celebrating the births of our children born this year, and our own vital connections to the Earth and each other, in which we ground our hope.

~ Reclaiming’s Spiral Dance website

starmeijer2Starhawk

photograph taken by Bert Meijer of Holland

I also encourage Crossroads readers to check out the excellent interview that Jason Pitzl-Waters of The Wild Hunt did with Starhawk regarding the Spiral Dance and the anniversary:

http://wildhunt.org/blog/2009/09/interview-with-starhawk.html

In the spirit of making this event as inclusive as possible, American Sign Language Interpreters are being made available for this event so that Deaf individuals can participate. Several interpreters are offering up their services for the ritual, the music, etc. The Spiral Dance Planning Committee is working with Ocean and other members of Reclaiming to assure that the event is as accessible to the Deaf Community as possible.

Let’s demonstrate our support of these efforts by attending. If you’re going to be in the Bay Area for Samhain, why not do something different this year and join us? This event promises to be an unforgettable experience!

(continued below)

SD-Poster-09_Final

poster photograph by Michael Starkman

30th Anniversary Spiral Dance Ritual

Hosted by Reclaiming

Saturday, October 31, 2009

7:30 p.m. – 11:30 p.m.

(doors open at 6:00 p.m. – come earlier to look around)

Kezar Pavilion in Golden Gate Park

San Francisco, CA

tickets on sale for sliding scale fee

for more information and to see a video, check this link

http://reclaimingspiraldance.org/

In order to include members of the Deaf Community in this ritual, if you have any names of individuals who have died in the past year (since November 1 of 2008), or babies who have been born in the past year, please feel free to pass this information on to me (Ocean) at oshginva@gmail.com and I will do my best to get these names included in the ritual.

Any and all people are invited to participate in the Spiral Dance – you do not need to be Pagan yourself. If you wish to attend, please know that you will be welcomed regardless of your own spiritual path.

drum.side.T

As the Spiral Dance website says…

When we dance the spiral, young and old together, we remember and honor our own past at that same time we renew our vision and embrace the future.

Won’t you join me for the dance?

Posted in Archives #1 Deafness and Accessibility, Creating Accessibility, Deaf/Hearing Relations, Deaf/Pagan Relations, Deafness, Equal Communication Access, Interpreting, Magick, Paganism, Ritual, Sabbats, Sign Language, Spirituality, Women's Spirituality, witchcraft | 15 Comments »

October’s Full Moon – “The Desire to Relate”

Saturday October 3 2009 by ocean1025

Arian Moon Compass

&

The Desire to Relate


October Full Moon, 2009



This month’s full moon is Sunday, October 4th in the cardinal fire sign, Aries symbolized by the ram or ram’s horn and ruled by Mars, planet of the desire to relate. Aries is said to be the warrior of the zodiac, but I am much fonder of the larger category of the desire to relate. War and warriors are indicative of either a break down in that desire or an abuse of power. In Aries we can touch into our desire. We can play, work or fight, but our feelings about our desire to interact with others will be highlighted at this time.

web_ariesAries is also known for the power of concentration, the ability to focus. To hear that, to say that, is one thing. To understand how it can manifest is another. Just recently a friend made a comment about her Aries Sun husband that really expanded for me the concept of what it is like to live a focused life. I had never thought of what qualities manifesting such focus could look like. Let’s just say that multi-tasking suffers from this perspective. Not that one necessarily can’t, but the desire to maintain the focus just kind of takes priority and distractions are easily ignored.

RTEmagicC_inqmnd_focus.jpgThere are many places and times in our lives when this kind of focus could work to our advantage. Under an Arian Moon we can experience a focusing of our emotions, our psychic abilities, our intuition. Watching who and what catches our attention, what arouses our desire to be in relationship; will deepen an understanding of who we are and what motivates us.

The image of the chart is again that of a compass. This month the Sun in the 3rd house of communication is the point with the opposition to the Moon in the 9th house of spiritual ethics, higher education, reaching out to foreign cultures/spiritualities creating one side of the compass arrow. Jupiter, planet of expansion, storytelling, and faith, trines the Sun from the 7th house of intimate partnership to form the other side of the compass point.

The compass is pointing East of South giving us “E” and “S” words to form our desired actions. So we could…

  • take the Easy Slide into our future
  • get an Early Start
  • Express the Sacred in word and deed
  • Eliminate Sarcasm
  • Embody the Spiral
  • Enlighten the Shadow
  • Enlarge our Sanctuary
  • Educate the Self

Our choices are limited only by our imagination and desire. With an Arian focus and energy available, and a supportive trine to the planet of expansion, Jupiter, it is a good time to begin manifesting new feelings about our relationship with self and others.

And with those words I stop. The desire to relate is mightier than the pen at this time. Have a good time and go play with others.

Once again I am indebted to my friend Beverly Hof-Miller of Full Moon Musings for her teachings and writings on the Full Moon, which she generously shares with me and others. Thanks, Bev!

Posted in Archives #4 Pagan Thoughts and Writings, Astrology, Empowerment, Paganism, Spirituality, Women, Women's Spirituality, witchcraft | 2 Comments »

Mountain Song – for Ginny

Saturday September 12 2009 by ocean1025

Some of you may recall the posts which I have begun here sharing my experiences on San Bruno Mountain. Unfortunately, due to recent changes in my life I haven’t been able to continue this series, but I hope to get back to it and write more about this mountain and my visits to it in the near future.

I came to know this mountain as the result of meeting a very special individual at PantheaCon – Ginny Anderson. I took her workshop on “Circling San Francisco Bay” and learned about different sacred sites around the Bay Area. So far I have touched two of them… Kirby Cove and San Bruno Mountain. It is my goal to visit them all – hopefully accompanied by Ginny.

I am indebted to Ginny not only for her friendship, but also for my continued existence. She has been a source of strength and support when I was going through some truly troubled times in my life. With her background in psychology, spirituality, and ecology she has been able to combine all three into a unique healing method which reached down to the very core of my being, and helped me to find my path when I couldn’t see it for myself.

I remember when Ginny and I were hiking on San Bruno, that fragments of a song I remembered kept entering my mind. It was a song that was so appropriate to the moment, and to the woman I consider my teacher, my healer, and my friend.

Ginny has been a strong voice in the preservation of San Bruno Mountain, and in educating others on the importance of maintaining the mountain and the surrounding lands not only as a sacred site, but as the last living remnant of the Franciscan ecosystem – home to many rare and endangered species. In addition, it was also home to a Native American tribe thousands of years ago, and should be preserved in their memory as well.

But like many similar sites all over the country, San Bruno Mountain is being threatened by encroaching development. There are cities nestled right at its base, and highways which pass right by its ancient shell mounds. We are already seeing bulldozers and heavy machinery on the mountain’s lands. Time is running out, and we need to act NOW. For more information on how you can help, please check out the San Bruno Mountain Watch website.

But getting back to the song…

Trying to remember the lyrics was driving me crazy! I could remember a woman I knew back in Kansas City (when I lived there several years ago) who sang this song at the Gaia Goddess Gathering when I attended it one year. I knew that wasn’t the first time I had seen this song performed, but I couldn’t remember where or who.

So I got on the computer and did an internet search. Sure enough, I found it. The song was originally written and recorded by Holly Near, well-known in the Women’s Community as a singer and songwriter, teacher, feminist, and activist. Growing up herself in the rural community of Ukiah in central California, Holly has always felt a strong affinity for the land, and many of her songs reflect this. She has spoken of the need to preserve this land for future generations:

Mountaintop removal is devastating. Google it and you will get lots of information as well as suggested activism. Mountaintop removal has wiped out 500 mountains and destroyed historic communities. Join the national campaign to bring mountaintop removal to an end.

~ Holly Near

I think Ginny and Holly have a lot in common.

So for you, my friend… I share this song.

Mountain Song
Holly Near / © Hereford Music (ASCAP)

I have dreamed on this mountain

Since first I was my mother’s daughter

And you can’t just take my dreams away – not with me watching

san bruno and highway

You may drive a big machine

But I was born a great big woman

And you can’t just take my dreams away – not with me fighting

bulldozer

This old mountain raised my many daughters

Some died young – some are still living

But if you come here to take our mountain

Well we ain’t come here to give it

hikers on mountain

I have dreamed on this mountain

Since first I was my mother’s daughter

And you can’t just take my dreams away – not with me watching

No you can’t just take my dreams away – without me fighting

mountain and bush

No you can’t just take my dreams away

Posted in Archives #3 A Deaf Pagan Shares, Art & Literature, Deaf/Hearing Relations, Deaf/Pagan Relations, Earth Day, Healing, Music, Nature, Spirituality, Universal Issues, Women, Women's Spirituality | 1 Comment »

Broken Arrows

Monday September 7 2009 by ocean1025

A couple of years ago, I did a Motivational Training Workshop for DEAF, Inc. in Massachusetts. One of the participants in that workshop was my Spirit Sistah, Crystal Dolphin. While the main feature of that workshop was a firewalk, I also taught other exercises as well, including breaking boards with your bare hand, and snapping arrows with your throat. To read about Crystal’s experiences with this workshop, click here.

Recently Crystal sent me a funny message on my pager about an experience she had related to this workshop. I asked if she would write up something about it, and the result can be found below. Thanks Sis, for taking the time to share your story.

Enjoy!

~ Ocean

While preparing for a July 4th weekend camping trip in the White Mountains, I was running errands and picking up supplies on my day off from work.  Being in the area and having in my mind a recent discussion with my boyfriend on “the best” fishing lures, I decided to stop in Jerry’s Bait & Tackle.

crystal camping with mollie

Crystal camping with her canine companion, Mollie

I wandered in and began to look around.  There were two customers at the counter getting some questions answered by Jerry’s right hand man, who excused himself to ask if I needed help.  I smiled and responded, “That’s okay, thank you.  Take care of these gentlemen while I browse.  I may have a couple of questions after.”   Honestly, I had a question that had nothing to do with fishing, but I’ll explain that later.

As I continued with my browsing, I got that “I’m being watched” feeling and I looked up to find the man behind the counter, continuing his conversation with his customers, but with eyes fixed on me.  For a minute I speculated that he must have been thinking, “This gal goes fishing?”  I figured I didn’t look the type.  (Well, in actuality I don’t fish, but my sweetie does.)  I set back to looking for those “best lures”, which I didn’t find.  As I started back to the counter to ask about them, the man, still watching me, said in a slightly unsure tone, “I know you.”

I smiled and answered in a rather playful tone, “Do you?”  I never thought he would recognize me.  I had only visited the store once, three and a half years earlier after all, and I was not alone on that trip.

You could almost see the gears turning in his head as he was putting it together.  Then suddenly his eyes widened and he exclaimed,

“You’re one of them crazy ladies that breaks arrows with your neck and walks on fire!”

LMAO!

Ocean had traveled to Massachusetts in October of 2005 to conduct a fire-walk workshop at Peace Abbey in Sherborn.  Of course, being in my area this was a good time to visit with her Spirit Sistah, and put me to work helping her prepare for the workshop while we spent some time together.  One thing Ocean wanted to include in the workshop activities was snapping the arrow.  But this requires a specific type of arrow, which we were unable to find at any of the local sporting goods stores.  On the evening before the workshop, we had stopped at a local restaurant to meet with some friends for dinner and drinks.  Mentioning our dilemma, one acquaintance, who happens to enjoy hunting, piped up and told us we could find such arrows at Jerry’s Bait & Tackle.  On the way to the workshop the next day, there we stopped.  Well, two excited witches asking for a couple dozen arrows raised the eyebrows of the store’s owner and his staff.  Ocean explained what the arrows would be used for, and even offered a demonstration, to which the owner responded, “Um, no thank you, I’m certain I’m not insured for that!”

Snapping arrow

Snapping the arrow

Back to present day. Laughingly I said, “Well, that was going to be one of my questions.  Are you still the only sporting goods shop in the county that sells those arrows?  Because, mine’s broken!”  and I pulled out of my bag my broken arrow from that workshop.  He took it from my hands and stared at it, saying, “Woooow, you really did it?”  Then his eyes went right to my throat, looking for the scar he was sure would be there.  I asked if he wanted to see the bottoms of my feet too, because I did walk the fire as well.  No scars, really! He just shook his head and smiled saying, “you gals are nuts!”

Unable to contain their curiosity any longer, the confused customers asked, “What do they do???”  He answered that I had been in with my girlfriend a few years earlier for specific arrows, and that I had broken that arrow he was holding with my neck.  Obviously this didn’t clarify anything for them.  So he went and retrieved an arrow from a display, put the feathered end up against the wall and the point to his throat, holding it up this way, and explained, “They put it like this and walk into it until it breaks.  I don’t know how they do it.”  I said, “Well go ahead!  You’re halfway there.”  He stepped back and let the arrow drop into his hand, and said, “Oh, no, no, no.  It’s all yours,” and handed me the arrow.  I said playfully, knowing what the answer would be, “Oh, you want a demonstration this time?”

“Oh no!  No, thank you!  Jerry would kill me!”  He chuckled, “but you can take that and break it however you want. “

Well then, feeling l couldn’t leave without buying something, I said, “I’ll take two”, and paid for the second one and assured him I’d be back to visit sooner this time.  I took my broken arrow, my new arrows, said thank you, and left the store thinking I must give kudos to Jerry’s Bait & Tackle in Milford, MA for their excellent customer service, and the staff’s excellent memory.  I was amazed that I was recognized even without my “partner-in-crime”, over three years since our visit there.  Ocean and I must have made quite an impression!

I sent a quick text to Osh to share the story.  She got a kick out of it, and thought you all would too.  (So I’m finally getting round to it!  It’s been a busy summer!)

I was halfway home before I realized that I had forgotten all about asking about the lures for my boyfriend – ooops.  But that’s okay, we’ll have to make a habit of visiting there for such supplies.  We both prefer to support our local shop owners anyway.  And I’ll just have to go back, because my brand new arrows are broken!  ;)

Snapped Arrow

The broken arrow

One now sits on my boyfriend’s shelf in his bedroom.  He had found a nice private little spot in the mountains that he had wanted to take me to as he said it had a very “spiritual feeling”.  And that it did, and I just happened to have my arrows in my backpack. The other currently adorns my altar.  Evan claimed he never wants to see me do that again.  LOL  I guess we’re not going to get him to attend one of Ocean’s fire-walk workshops anytime soon.

WARNING

Please DO NOT attempt to do this exercise on your own.

Crystal has been trained by a certified Motivational Trainer.

Specific equipment and instructions are necessary

to do this exercise properly.

Attempting this exercise on your own could result in serious injury.

Posted in Archives #5 Fire Walk With Me, Empowerment, Firewalking, Humor, Magick, Spirituality, Women, witchcraft | 6 Comments »

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