Deaf Pagan Crossroads

Back in 2011, I began a new tradition of choosing a “Word of the Year” at the beginning of January, to see me through the year. It’s my alternative to the New Year’s Resolutions which I never believed in and refuse to make. A Word of the Year isn’t a resolution; it’s a theme – a word to set the tone for the year. A word with intention and purpose, but none of the expectations and punishments of a resolution.

Over the years, I have chosen various words for my Year Words – in 2011 and again in 2012, my word was “roots” – to signify where I was in my life at that time, and the fact that I was putting down roots in a new home of my own. In 2013 I chose another earthy concept as my Year Word – “Compost.” This word symbolized my desire to take all the shit I had been accumulating in my life and turning it into a rich medium for growth and change; for making positive things happen. When 2014 rolled around, I decided I wanted to go in a different direction. While earthy matters were still important to me, I found myself changing, pursuing new areas of interest…particularly writing. I announced that I was working on a book, and found myself wanting a word that reflected this newfound sense of purpose. So my Year Word for 2014 was “Pages.” In 2015 I continued the writing theme by taking pages a bit further and creating “Chapters,” which continued to be my theme for 2016 and 2017 – to create, to write, to live, to experience and to celebrate some good ones.

It is now 2018. And while I have certainly created some chapters over the last few years, they haven’t all been as good as I hoped. Sadly, my Book of Life doesn’t seem to be producing any “happy endings.” As a result, I have found my sense of hope and optimism waning; my enthusiasm and zest for life has pretty much hit the skids. For the past year I have struggled with anxiety and depression, and maintaining a positive attitude in the midst of the negativity that seems to surround me has grown increasingly challenging.

But returning to another Compost year doesn’t seem to be the answer. I need something more than that.

The solution has come in the way of gifts from friends.

First of all, a fellow Deaf writer who recently published a self-help book gifted me with a copy of it. Her name is Karen Putz and the book is titled Unwrapping Your Passion: Creating the Life You Truly Want.

In this book, Karen describes how at the ripe old age of 44 she rediscovered her own passion for barefoot water skiing, and used her love of the sport to shake up the status quo of aging, and redefine the barometer of living a passionate life. Something about this book really speaks to me – especially since I will be turning sixty years of age this year. I have always believed in living a passionate and creative life, and somewhere along the way I have lost that. I need to unwrap my own passion.

Thank you, Karen. This is going to be my theme for 2018, and for the years to come.

Then my dear friend Crystal gave me another meaningful gift – a deck of cards. Not just an ordinary playing deck, but a set of affirmation cards.

It’s called the Healthy Chicks Spark Your Bliss Deck – 36 cards containing practical affirmations designed to help you set your soul on fire. You pick a card and allow the word and its message to serve as your inspiration; writing out your thoughts, sharing the message with others, and letting those sparks fly.

That’s something else I really need to do – is spark my bliss. Yet another theme for 2018.

And because I really like the number three – which is a powerful and magickal number for many of us Pagans – I felt I need a third theme to round out the year. Something I have noticed lately is that I haven’t been as connected to my spiritual path as I would like. I haven’t felt that same relationship with the Goddess that I have enjoyed in the past. I feel the need to rediscover my faith – to spend more time drawing in the energy from nature and from Mother Earth herself. I plan to go back and reread some of the writings of dear teacher and friend, Starhawk…and incorporate those teachings more into my life.

There are several books of hers that I think will help with this, but one in particular comes to mind: The Earth Path – Grounding Your Spirit in the Rhythms of Nature. Filled with meditations, chants, and blessings; and offering magical spells and exercises to create a primer on our relationship to the earth, this book offers healing for the spirit, and helps one to find her own source of strength and renewal – something I definitely need for this year.

So here is my third theme: reconnecting to my faith.

Unwrapping. Sparking. Reconnecting.

Passion. Bliss. Faith.

Those are my themes for 2018; my Words of the Year. I’m going to unwrap my passion and renew my zest for life in my ripe old age, spark my bliss and set my soul on fire, and reconnect to my faith and ground my spirit in the richness of the earth itself.

Happy New Year to all my Crossroads readers, and may you find and follow your own themes for the year.