Recently, I submitted a blog I had written about Firewalking to a well-known popular blogsite, in hopes that it might be posted in their Guest Blogger section.
Yes, you read that right…Firewalking - the art of walking across red hot coals with your bare feet. I happen to be a Firewalker myself, and I had written a blog discussing firewalking from a deaf perspective. By the way, you can find this blog (actually a series of blogs) by going to the Categories section on the sidebar menu and clicking on Archives #5 - Fire Walk With Me.
I received a friendly, polite response from the blog site Administrator informing me that regretfully, while they found my blog to be interesting and well-written, they were turning down my submission.
They gave me three reasons for doing so -
The first was that the blog was too long. I have to admit that I agree…it was a pretty long blog. Obviously I must have missed school the day when they were teaching about KISS - Keep It Short and Sweet; Keep It Simple and Stupid; Keep It Serious and Sincere; Keep It Silly and Salacious…or whatever the hell “S” words you want to insert here. The point being that KISS-ing is something I prefer to do with my mouth…not my writing. And yet it seems no matter how hard I try, my blogs always end up appearing like a draft effort at creating the next Great American Novel.
Their second concern was that the blog came across as being self-promotional. Again, I have to plead guilty. It’s not just that I am a Firewalker - I also happen to be the WORLD’S FIRST AND ONLY DEAF PERSON to be certified by the Firewalking Institute for Research and Education (F.I.R.E.) as a Firewalking Instructor. In other words, I don’t just walk across them embers myself…I also teach others how to do it as well. I confess, that’s an achievement of which I’m pretty damn proud.
But it was their third reason that especially struck me. I’ve had previous blogs published by this particular site in the past - a two-part series of blogs in which I shared some of my views regarding the recent Gallaudet Protest. Apparently the Administration received some emails expressing concern that through these blogs, I was in fact “promoting the Pagan religion.”
Hmmmm…interesting.
I won’t lie, folks - this hurt.
No, it was not the rejection of the blog itself that upset me. I can fully understand, respect, and accept the decision which the Administration made…and to a certain extent, I agree with them.
What hurt was discovering that members of the Deaf Community had expressed this concern, and yet were apparently unable - or more likely unwilling - to do so directly (such as via the blog commentary sections), that I might have been made aware of such concerns, and we could have discussed them openly and objectively. Perhaps by doing so we could have come to a better understanding of one another…of what our views are; how we feel and why we feel that way; where we are coming from; and what our true intentions are. And in the process, come to a mutually agreeable and peaceful resolution where everyone can walk away feeling that they all gained something from such a discussion.
I have to admit - my first reaction was to wonder if it was religion in general that they were objecting to…or Paganism in particular. Call me paranoid if you wish, but the harsh reality is that Paganism is not a well-accepted spiritual path in our society, and that includes the Deaf Community. Many members of the Pagan Community and even myself have faced discrimination and/or rejection on the basis of such beliefs - in the workplace, in the schools, by the government, by businesses, by their neighborhoods, and sometimes even by their families.
As a member of both the Deaf and the Pagan Communities, I am often fascinated by the similarities that I find between the two - not merely the common struggles we face, but also in the way we view our communities, the members within it, and how those members interact with one another. I’ll be blogging about some of those similarities at a later date.
The point is, I am a Deaf Pagan…and I am proud to identify myself as such. And yes, my blogs are going to reflect that. I cannot and will not separate the two. They both make up an integral part of the person I am, and I will not apologize for that fact.
But time and time again…I struggle to find that “middle ground” where I can happily merge both cultures to please myself, while at the same time meeting the comfort levels of others. It’s not an easy process.
When I go into the Pagan Community, I am often the only Deaf person there…and understandably my perspectives on Paganism are going to be colored by my identity as a Deaf person - to the point where I have actually gotten accused by other Pagans of being “too Deaf” and trying to cram the whole Deafhood thing down everyone’s throat.
Then I move over to the Deaf Community, where I tend to view things from a Pagan perspective - after all, I have been a practicing Pagan for 25+ years and it is more than just a religion, it becomes my whole philosophy and lifestyle - and what happens? I get accused of being “too Pagan”…of trying to promote the Pagan religion, and cram Witchcraft down everyone’s throat. Or even worse, I get shunned by other Deaf folks, who view my beliefs as an indication of “devil worship.”
So what’s a Deaf Pagan like me supposed to do? Where do we fit in? How do we find our place in the world?
If you go to my blog on this site titled “Are Deaf Pagans Public Enough?” and read the comment posted by Wolfers, you can see where she says:
“So in time, I decided to go back in the Broom Closet. I don’t like it, but I just don’t like to be alone, either. So either I am an open Pagan and be isolated from the Deaf Community, or be accepted in the Deaf Community and say nothing about my beliefs. You can decide which I picked.”
What makes me sad is that Wolfers had to pick at all.
I don’t know the answer to this one, folks.
I haven’t figured out what it is about religion in general and Paganism in particular that seems to get people’s knickers all twisted in a bunch.
Nor have I figured out what it is about deafness, and trying to educate people about being deaf, and living in a deaf world, and dealing with communication issues, and advocating for greater access, and so forth that seems to make so many folks uncomfortable.
I wish I could find that answer - because Goddess knows it would make my life a helluva lot easier.
The bottom line is this…
I am Deaf by birth. I am Pagan by choice. Don’t make me have to pick between the two.
NOTE:
I want to make it clear to everyone that I am not in any way criticizing this particular blog site, or implying that it or its readership are insensitive, intolerant Witchhunters. Far from it! I’ve found the majority of individuals there to be a friendly, welcoming bunch and I always enjoy reading the blogs and comments to be found there.
What I am trying to do is to both express and process my own feelings as an individual who is a member of both communities, and the struggles that occur as a result of such.
Perhaps in doing so, we can begin that process of learning from, and thus better understanding each other.
Bright Blessings,
~ Ocean
This sculpture shows the sign for "connect"...and that is what Deaf Pagan Crossroads is all about - making connections. Connections between Deafhood and Paganism, connections between the Deaf Community and the Hearing Community, connections between myself as the writer and you as the reader. I hope you will take the time to read my various posts, some of which are listed below. Welcome to the Crossroads, and I hope you make some connections here!
Your blog made me think. I had tried to register my blog with a deaf blogsite but I never had heard from them at all. Either I had messed up with RSS code or that they had reviewed my blog, especially the section on how I describe myself “Deaf pagan. Redhead., blah blah” and decided not to accept me? Now, I can’t jump to that conclusion, as I said it may be due to me not knowing about RSS codes and site technical stuff. Beside most of my blogs I write is not about paganism- it’s about concerns in deaf community (mental health, HIV/AIDS, norms in Deaf), as well as personal experiences of mine.
You know what’s funny, Ocean? When I lived in MD, I was open about my beliefs in the Deaf community. There were deaf people there who are curious. I hadn’t even encountered a hostile or uncomfortable person when they discovered my beliefs. It was only when I moved to Colorado, I found out about judgemental folks in the deaf community. I don’t mean the WHOLE deaf community but so far I haven’t even encountered a deaf person who was curious or acceptable yet. So like I said in my comment, I went back in the closet. It’s tough for the deaf lesbian and gay community here too, that often I’d get news that Bob(name made up) moved away, Lucy (name made up) moved to the east coast because of alienation and isolation.
Well, all I can say is that I look forward to the day I get out of here and get back to the East coast where I can be accepted for who I am and what I believe in, and not be afraid.
Just playing devil’s advocate here (btw, I’ve just found out that devil’s advocates were actually clergymen who held the job of opposing canonization of prospective saints. Neat), but would you have found it easy to read, say, a blog from a Deaf Christian on that site that was 1) long, 2) self-promotional, and 3) paid homage to his or her own beliefs, which you did not share? My guess is that such a person would probably feel the same way you do about being able to find a welcoming community.
Double marginalization is a bitch.
But so is figuring out how to express yourself and live your life without marginalizing someone else.
Thank you for sharing. I think this type of message needs constant renewal.
By the same token, Wolfers…your comment has made me think as well!
Am I being unnecessarily harsh on the Deaf Community - implying that they are all a bunch of judgmental, intolerant a-holes who can’t or won’t accept those who have different beliefs, lifestyles, etc.
And by the same token, am I also being unnecessarily harsh on the Pagan Community as well…portraying them as being ignorant and insensitive?
But the fact remains…you and I - along with other Deaf Pagans I know - HAVE encountered these experiences, and HAVE struggled with these feelings.
The question remains…how do we deal with these experiences, and how can we process the feelings that they leave us with?
Neither being deaf or wholly pagan (in the closet pagan/christian), I cannot say I have experienced this type of ignorance. However, from a personal perspective, almost all people (humans, if you will) are biased in some form, whether it be gender, religion, race, region of the world you live in, etc. I’ve been “too” female, “too white” (ie, not American Indian enough), “too southern”, “too country”, “too liberal”, etc. I feel that the rolling of the eyes is all these dummies deserve, and usually give it freely! I myself , due to certain upbringing issues, have found myself unusually biased toward people, and try to stop it when I figure it out. As far as how I deal with my feeling residue, I am of the same opinion of the wizard in Terry Goodkind’s books…. “Wizard’s first rule… people are stupid”.
You bring up some good points also, Curious Wind.
In response to your question, allow me to share one little experience:
Back during the Gallaudet Protest, Father Thomas Coughlin - himself a Gallaudet alumnus AND a Roman Catholic priest, posted an open letter to President I. K. Jordan, in which he expressed his own concerns regarding the whole protest issue. Understandably, Father Coughlin quoted a bit from the Scriptures in his blog.
Now, considering that we come from opposite ends of the spiritual spectrum, I could have chosen when I saw and recognized his name, to pass over Father Coughlin’s blog. I didn’t. I read it….I agreed with pretty much all of what he had to say…and I posted a comment to his blog saying as much.
Now, this might not be a proper comparison, but the point I did want to make here is that simply because someone maintains spiritual beliefs that I may not share doesn’t mean that I can’t appreciate what they have to say…and perhaps even agree on some level.
As for that Deaf Christian being able to find a welcoming community… sorry, but I think I have to challenge you a bit there. Remember, Christianity IS the the predominate and thus acceptable religion of this country. There are far more Deaf Christian Churches out there than there are Deaf Pagan Covens. There are far more Deaf Christian Clergy out there than there are Deaf High Priestesses. There are far more Sign Language Interpreters out there willing to interpret Christian services than Pagan rituals.
My point wasn’t so much about not feeling welcome at that site…because I certainly haven’t been made to feel unwelcomed.
My point is…where can I find a place where I do in fact feel welcomed to be all aspects of myself - Deaf and Pagan? Where do I find a Pagan coven that can accept me and provide the needed access? Where do I find other Deaf High Priestesses, or just simply Deaf Pagans, period? Where do I find interpreters willing to interpret for Pagan rituals, and do so for little or no pay?
Why does Wolfers write about moving back to the East Coast, so she can be accepted for who she is and what she believes in, and not have to be afraid?
You’re right…Double Marginalization is a bitch.
So is figuring out how to express yourself and live your own life.
Personally I have no problem with a Deaf Pagan. In fact, I think it is cool that the Pagan Community have at least two Deaf members. I remember one English professor at Gallaudet sharing her Pagan beliefs with us one time. That was the first time I’ve heard about this particular religion. Many years later I met quite few hearing Pagans and learned some bits about their often misunderstood religion. It’s an interesting religion, that’s for sure. You won’t find any judgement from me.
Mishkazena
Paganism has been around before Christanity. I was reading an article years ago how the Roman Catholic church adopted a lot of pagan rites such as the robe, rituals, offerring the holy communion and at the same time the Roman Catholics spend their time to remove the pagans from the face of the earth.
Paganism has many people involved and no point to go out and putting them down. They are a religion and should be respected.
If there is a Deaf Paganism sect and people will find interest based on their rich history. Paganism should be included in Religious courses because there are so much to learn from them.
Peace and Blessed to be you!
Appreciation of what is unique and what is in common between peoples is the core of human relationships…until it comes to religion, politics, ethnic identification, or hearing status. People go on the defensive, half expecting to be belittled for who they are or what they believe in.
That’s too bad, because there is more in common between religions than there are differences. Some religions do start off wrong: “mine is the one true religion and you better convert to save your soul.” A better approach for us all would be: “let’s share and support each other.”
People strive to express who they are in many forms…and most of the time it is accepted by others. However, express an idea that is in the category of religion as a personal sharing and whoa! Defenses go up.
Same thing happens when we express deaf culture to a hearing group. Hey! “This means we have to accept a disabled condition as a group norm…what does this mean for my being hearing??”
Tsk. Self expression can be so hard. Welcome to the blogosphere, Deaf Pagans. Your language is beautiful and the ideas inspiring. Keep on sharing and expressing. Peace,
DPG
There’s an article in this week’s New Yorker by a Jewish writer, who wrote about being driven by the Orthodox Jewish faith, though not so amicably as a child. I found it useful that he shared how his religious upbringing affected his personal life now. It was pretty revealing.
Like me, I know that we use blogging as a means to share and be heard, which would ultimately also help with understanding our feelings and reasoning. I gather you are trying to figure out how to incorporate pagan beliefs into writing. I guess what I would be most interested in reading in general is how certain topics are contemporary. I look forward to what you have to share.
WOW! What a wonderful feeling to wake up this morning and find these comments here, with their warm, friendly, thought-provoking statements in regards to my blog.
Thank you for such comments…they do much to lift my spirits (no pun intended
) and restore my belief that we will indeed find that “middle ground” - where we can embrace the commonalities instead of shunning the differences.
My creative juices are running again, and I already am thinking of some ideas for future blogs. As I promised in this one, I will be discussing some of those similiarities that I have encountered between the Deaf and the Pagan communities; and how we might be able to use those similarities to gain a better understanding - not merely of each other, but of ourselves as well.
Thank you for your welcomes, and welcome to Deaf Pagan Crossroads.
Goddess Bless and Goddess Keep,
Ocean
Wow. I’m amazed at the narrow-mindedness of those who complained. I absolutely agree - no one complains when a Christian spouts off about a topic and brings his/her religion into things. But when someone else of any other faith discusses the same topic viewed through the prism of his/her faith and it goes out to mainstream America, some will take offense. I don’t get that attitude. I hope that site’s administrators will read your post here and realize they shouldn’t reject entries just for discussing a faith. I’d expect a site representing a very diverse metro area to accept entries from *any* faith, including Christianity, Islam, Judaism, and all others, and yes, Paganism and Satanism (not to equate the two - I know they are quite different!). I’m so sorry this happened and thank you for bringing this up - it has a lot to do with the unity that so many of us want for the deaf community. Unity means listening to each other and respecting differences, *including* religious ones. Keep bloggin’.
Thank you for your comments, Jen…you make some very good points, and I hope others will read and think about them.
In defense of that particular site and its administrators, I do want to say that there are no hard feelings, and I bear no grudges. Their decision to turn down the blog was a difficult one, based on a number of factors…of which religion was only one of them. There are certain guidelines which the site does strive to maintain, and trying to find that “happy medium” that respects the readership’s feelings, desires, and expectations can be a challenge.
But at the same time, how do we handle the issues of religion and spirituality within the Deaf Blogosphere; especially when - as you say - some of those faiths might not conform with the mainstream? Does religion and spirituality have a place within the Deaf Community…including its blogging community?
This is an important question, and actually it is one that this site’s administrator and I have been discussing. He has asked me to consider writing a special blog on this very subject, and I’m currently sitting back and thinking about how we can approach the topic…because I think it could generate some very interesting and thought-provoking discussion!
I totally agree with you, Jen…if we are going to work towards that Unity we talk about so much, then we are going to have to learn to listen to each other and respect those differences.
Thank you for commenting!
Goddess Bless and Goddess Keep,
~ Ocean
Hon, go to myspace and you can post in a blog any thing you want to. Granted you have to make it public, but trust me people find it. I have had blogs found I didn’t think anyone would be interested in and in those cases if the content is something I’d rather the whole web not be in on I make it friends only or private for certain people.
We still live in a world of intolerance about many different things, not just pagans. It is a shame but it is true.
Thanks for the tip, Charmed. Actually, Deaf Pagan Crossroads is my own blog site, and I fully intend to post whatever I dang well please here!
Correct me if I’m wrong, bloggers…but I think a lot of Deaf Bloggers are hooked up on WordPress, which is another good blogging program. But certainly Myspace is another option - and options are always a nice thing to have!
It’s sad but true that intolerance exists on many different levels in this world. If we all do our little part to make a dent in that intolerance, maybe we can leave this world a better place for the generations to come.
[...] Marginalized: Deaf and … Ocean happens to write from the perspective of someone who is both Deaf and Pagan–but it’s not [...]
What a beautifully written post, Ocean!
I thought you touched on many themes that were very relevant to my own blog at http://reunifygally.wordpress.com so I posted encouraging people to come here and read what you wrote. I hope they do!
If you would be interested in writing as a Guest blogger for ReunifyGally on what it’s like navigating the world as a Deaf Pagan, dealing with double marginalization, etc., please let me know. I could also simply repost things you’ve posted here if you give me specific permission.
This also goes for other Deaf Pagans (and other Deaf/deaf people experiencing double marginalization) reading this comment (http://reunifygally.wordpress.com/guidelines-for-guest-bloggers/)
i guess its pretty ruff to have a handy cap as people that dont, dont always understand or not very tollorent but keep on going they will understand one day
Yes, birch…it can be rough at times. But like you said, you just have to keep on going and continue to educate and advocate and build bridges where you can and open doors when you can.
I think non-Pagan people are not used to the idea that one can talk about one’s religion and NOT be trying to convert others to it. When most Christians talk about their religion, there’s a subtext of them trying to convert you. Not so with talking about Paganism (when we do that, if there is a subtext, we mostly just want acceptance).
As to the reaction from the Pagan community - on the one hand it’s interesting to hear about Paganism from a Deaf, or lesbian, or gay, or bisexual, or transsexual perspective (I am myself bisexual) - but sometimes it feels like people are bringing it into every context, even ones where it’s not apparently relevant. I guess if you started every sentence with “As a Deaf Pagan…..” it would put people’s backs up (just as, if I started every sentence with “As a bisexual Pagan…” it would annoy people). But if something comes up that is relevant to my sexuality, I will mention it - and the same for mentioning Paganism in non-Pagan contexts. I’m not saying you were over-mentioning it, and maybe the people were just being closed-minded, I don’t know.
But as you say, it’s good to want to build bridges and open doors. And it’s not like people automatically ensure there’s provision for including everyone in events etc.
Ah yes all the world needs is tolerance. We should be tolerant of racism, hate other peoples intolerance etc that would make the world a better palce wouldn’t it?? no… Besides which all the things which one tolerates are bad things, society tolerates drivel like the Da Vinci code by dan Brown in order to promote free-speech. So in other words we should all hope for and work towards a world in which tolerance is no longer required, though I’m sur ethat wil be a long tiem comming.
Marc,
I am confused by your statements. If people were more tolerant of others’ differences, then we could learn to live together more peacefully despite such differences. It seems to me then, that there wouldn’t be such huge problems with racism, hate, and prejudice. I don’t think that all things which one tolerates are bad things. Differences are not bad. If all people were to hold the same opinions and beliefs, share all the same thoughts, have all the same interests - would not the world be a rather boring place?
Should we be tolerant of things like murder and hate-crimes? No. But a fictional novel? Those who read it either liked it or didn’t like it, and that’s perfectly fine.
I do agree that we should all work for a world in which tolerance is no longer required, if in that you mean that it is no longer required because we have grown past fighting over petty differences. Will it ever be a reality that people will learn to get along with others despite their differences? Probably not, unfortunately. But just sitting back and bitching about the things that are wrong with the world do not help in bringing about the desired change to make the world a better place.
Sometimes, all we can do is set the good example.
We must BE the change we wish to see in the world, as Mahatma Gandhi once stated.
(I haven’t figured out what it is about religion in general and Paganism in particular that seems to get people’s knickers all twisted in a bunch.)
I think a lot of it has to do with that we as humans are insecure about the unknown and that leads to fear of that unknown. Religion is what we use to comfort ourselves, much like a child with it’s cherished blanket or stuffed toy. Try to take away that security blanket or teddy bear and we panic, striking out like a frightened child.
(Nor have I figured out what it is about deafness, and trying to educate people about being deaf, and living in a deaf world, and dealing with communication issues, and advocating for greater access, and so forth that seems to make so many folks uncomfortable.)
Hmmm … let’s look at this in a different way. I’m wondering if maybe this doesn’t have a lot to do with people who see themselves as “normal”, actually fearing what they perceive as a physical flaw. Almost as if they were afraid that they might “catch” it if they were to associate with someone who was deaf. I’ve seen much the same thing happen when these same people encounter someone who is blind, missing limbs, has a mental handicap, or a birth defect that has affected the way they look or speak. It’s just a thought on my part, but I think perhaps it’s one worth considering in some degree as well.
[...] On Being Deaf… and Pagan [...]
Psychologically speaking, the response you get is the response you caused. It seems that, wherever you go, you’re pointing out your differences instead of similarities. With Pagans, you’re irritating them by saying you’re deaf and with the deaf you’re irritating them by saying you’re Pagan.
I have a pretty good feeling that you would do the same thing if you went to a meeting of deaf Pagans: you’d shove your firewalking down their throat and they’d accuse you of being “too firewalking” for their taste.
If you want a better relationship with others, blend in rather than sticking out. When you point out how different you are, people automatically assume you’re implying you’re better than them.
[...] a response to my post titled “On Being Deaf…and Pagan” - a post I wrote about my struggles of being “doubly marginalized,” so to speak. In this [...]
Merry Meet !!!
Wonder if you have a deaf pagan group in chicago? So I can go ther for ritual, and gather time. Please reply and thank u !!
Nina
[...] reader was expressing some of his thoughts in regards to my post “On Being Deaf…and Pagan”, in which I talked about exactly that: what it is like to be a Deaf person in the Pagan Community, [...]
I sort of have to agree with BMS. If you flash all your beliefs and being deaf and fire walking in people’s faces in any way, of course they are going to feel as if you are putting yourself above them. It’s natural human reactions is all. Especially when it is things they cannot relate to or do not understand or even know anything about.
I don’t believe that it is something you have done wrong necessarily. It is your right to be very proud of your accomplishments!! You deserve to do so, but in doing so you must also be aware of the reaction you will most likely get from expressing yourself in that way is all.
Dana
wow. i am hearing and pagan raising a deaf daughter (she is 17 so almost done raising lol)who is pagan as well. she was given a choice but she prefers circles to churches. i admit i just found you and i was so happy to i have only scanned it all so far. i was wondering about pagan signs. my daughter and i have made up one we use for like blessed be, so mote it be and such. you may have answered this already i am sorry if you have. if you haven’t i would love to hear your advice.
merry meet and thanks
Kamasea